Sunday, May 30, 2010

Is American Soccer For Douches, Or True Patriots?

According to soccer fans around the world, "Soccer is the strength of your country." It's also the universal sport of the world.

However, if you're anything anti-English, it's for douches. Hence, the lack of popularity in the pouting "Divided" United States.



From the picture above, the Royal Bafokeng Stadium, in Rustenburg, South Africa, looks more like an amoeba from a biology textbook.

In a world defined by it's resources, Rustenburg's Royal Bafokeng Stadium is a trophy for it's platinum rich region.

The U.S. Men's, a.k.a. The Yanks, first chapter in the 2010 World Cup against England, a.k.a.
The Three Lions, will be held June 12 at Royal Bafokeng Stadium.

Whether you fancy biology parallels, like amoeba-looking stadiums, this match isn't nearly as important to the Americans back home as it is to the English patriots.

The American attention span for soccer, or futbol, is about as interesting to their general public as reading the entire terms and agreement for upgrading itunes.

The English, on the other hand, have more at stake. They invented the game. Period.

More interesting is when a collapsing super power, like America, performs like a bunch of middle schoolers against countries barely the size of North Carolina or even Texas. In such instances, the world watches and mocks, "Any country worth fighting for has a good soccer team and any country worth dying for has a great soccer team." Where's the dream team for American soccer?

Should America's soccer team, the Yanks, be responsible for it's patriot's patriotism?

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Is Three The Charm?

Brad Guzan from Homer Glen, Illinois

Marcus Hahnemann from Seattle Washington


Tim Howard from North Brunswick, New Jersey

The US soccer team, U.S. Men, is in the hands of three goalkeepers...Brad Guzan, Marcus Hahnemann, and Tim Howard.

The first test of their validity is June 12 against England at Royal Bafokeng Stadium in Rustenburg, South Africa at 2:30 p.m. ET on ABC.

Will it matter that all three U.S. Men goalkeepers play for England teams?



Monday, January 25, 2010

Call in sick, if you're a Viking's fan.


Who ever said that you're over when you're in your 40's should care more about yesterday's NFC Championship.

If you think that's because I'm knocking Brett Favre, you're wrong. I'm talking about the 43 year old Saints franchise with their 31 to 28 win over the Vikings.

Talk about a Vikings hangover and a Saints cure. So, if you don't age with grace, call in sick.

After yesterday's game, it's wise to be the age of a Saint and the fan of a Viking.

What a great game.




Saturday, January 23, 2010

Earl Morrall still can't guarantee a Colt's win


The above picture is a flashback of quarterback Earl Morrall tossing the football to running back Tom Matte in Super Bowl III.



Interviewing Joe Namath, who famously guaranteed a pre-game win and won? Okay, sure. But Earl Morrall?

Earl Morrall, the Baltimore Colts quarterback 41 years ago, is being queried about his lost to the New York Jets in Super Bowl III.

For the record, Earl Morrall was the Colts quarterback for 4 months before he faced the Jets four year quarterback Joe Namath.

The fact that the Colts were still favored to win by 19 points should explain the historical upset. Jets 16 vs. Colts 7.

For a better Colts perspective, go back to forgetting Earl Morrall and try interviewing Don Shula. Shula wasn't always the Miami Dolphins head coach.


Friday, January 22, 2010

Will the Jets cross the end zone defeating the rested Colts?



It's a classic Aesop football moment of the tortoise and the hare.

Was the Colts foresight 20/20? Or will their strategy need an eye exam?

The race between the Indianapolis Colts and the New York Jets will be televised on CBS this Sunday at 3:00 p.m.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

My New Coach Can Beat Up Your New Coach


Indianapolis Colt's Head Coach
Jim Caldwel



The nagging history of unmaking Peyton Manning, Reggie Wayne, and Dallas Clark was the precarious Bobby Fischer decision of the Colt's new head coach Jim Caldwel.

Will it comeback to haunt him?




New York Jet's Head Coach
Rex Ryan



Rex Ryan, it's your move.

Contrary to Jim Caldwel, the Jet's new head coach, Rex Ryan, isn't afraid to win. Actually, he expects to capture Manning and his Colt's no-huddle henchmen with his own no-huddle Jet's defensive blitz.

It's a chess match with cleats for the AFC Championship.


The Who are the clue to a crazy Super Bowl.


The Who are playing at Super Bowl XLIV.

In which case, here's my prediction:

Everyone is expecting the Colts and the Saints to play XLIV. But when the Jets and the Vikings play instead, people unknowingly are going to be like, "The Who?".

So bet on Jets vs. Vikings for Super Bowl XLIV.

I'll think you're crazy when I'm right.